Now that I am moving into this new job(!) I am really taking a hard look at my habits and patterns of the past several years. Since I fell down the stairs on Thanksgiving weekend of 2004, I have had a dickens of a time following through on what I promise I am going to do.
There are a number of reasons for this:
- I neglect to write down what I commit to, and I forget I’ve committed to it.
- I get bogged down in the details of doing it, and I end up backing away from the task because all of a sudden it seems so enormous that I cannot begin to tackle it.
- I start to doubt myself, and I quickly give up.
- I just cannot sustain the attention to follow through.
- I don’t build enough accountability into my action plan.
This has got to change. I cannot step into this new role, behaving the way I have been. I have been doing better, on and off, over the past six months, but I still have let a bunch of things drop that I never should have abandoned. That haunts me. And I need to change this behavior.
So, I have started aggressively tracking my behavior each day. I have my notebook, where I track what I do, what the results are, and the reasons why I succeed or fail. And I get my colored highlighters and mark along the edges of the pages to show the nature of my activities — if they were positive experiences that came from positive choices and actions, or if they were negative events that arose from poor decisions and behaviors.
I use green to mark the good stuff, pink (which I hate!) to mark the bad stuff, and orange to mark the in-between stuff.
I mark in the margins of my notebook, so I can see the progression of events — and I can see at what times of day I have problems. I have REAL problems in the early/mid-afternoon. That much is clear.
So, tomorrow I am going to do the really hard stuff first. Get that taken care of, and then do easier things in the afternoon. And I am going to mark down the results of my choices and actions. I’m already seeing results, after doing this for about a week. And if I keep on this track, I am hopeful of getting my act together in ways that have eluded me for a number of years.
Most of all, I’m going to be focusing on advance planning — like they say in the Give Back Orlando material, I am going to plan my next day the night before, when I am relatively fresh and not pressed for time. And I need to get clear in my head up front how I’m going to go through my day, so I can prepare mentally and emotionally for it.
Tomorrow is going to be a challenging day. I can feel it. I’m finishing up work from my old job and navigating my progress into my new position. And I need to keep a steady head and steady hand while I’m at it.
If I screw this up, I just don’t know what I’ll do. So, I’ll do everything in my God-given power to NOT screw it up.
At least I have tools. So I’ll use them.