What am I recovering?

I’ve been thinking a lot about the concept of TBI recovery, lately, after some really great comments that came in within the past week or so.

I tend to think of this process as recovery — much like my recovering alcoholic friends. We are all recovering our dignity, our functionality, our involvement and engagement with life.

Certainly, what’s gone is gone. Deceased brain cells are just that – deceased. And some abilities may never come back to me.

But still, I guess I look deeper for what to recover. For me, it’s about recovering the character and quality of my life, not just specific abilities. Even if I can’t go from Point A to Point B as quickly as I once could, even if my memory is so fragmented and fried that I have no choice but to live in the moment, I can still take steps to regain my self-respect and dignity and approach my challenges creatively.

That, for me, is what recovery is all about. There is a lot of rebuilding, to be sure. That is a lifelong process for me, and I hope I never get to a place where I think I’m “done”. But ultimately, the recovery I seek is about overall quality of life, not just individual specifics. The details can be handled in any number of different ways.

But I need to recover my ability and willingness to handle them.

Onward.