I’m feeling profoundly sorry for myself, this evening. Lonely and lost and adrift.
But I’m being ridiculous. And tired. I realize that, and I have the good sense not to succumb to my despair.
Heck, I don’t have to stay stuck in my difficult experiences. I can choose to have whatever experience I want.
I can choose to live like I’m at the beach.
Yes, that sounds good. That’s what I’ll do — live like I’m at the beach.
I must admit, I’ve been fantasizing about ditching it all and moving to Hawai’i and living on the beach there. I’ve got relatives in the Honolulu area, and since their kids are all out and off in the world, they’d have room for me. Or, at least they’d let me use their shower. ‘Cause I’d rather live on the beach.
There’s always California, too. Someplace with lots of sand and waves and surfer life really appeals to me, these days, in the midst of all my hyper-responsibility.
What’s with the responsibility, anyway? How did I get to be grown up? Sometimes, it just sucks.
But back to how I want to live… I don’t want to live like I’m burdened by all this intense responsibility. I want to live like I’m whiling away my days on a beach, without a care in the world. And I can achieve that mindset myself, without needing to relocate (and divest of all my earthly possessions).
If I just live as though the things in my life aren’t weighing me down, and I treat my everyday experience like the discovery it is… then it doesn’t really much matter that I’m not camped out on a sandy stretch of open-air.
That’s what I’ll do – live like I live on the beach.