Taking a break for about a week

Leavin' on a jet plane...

I’m headed out of town for business travel in the morning, so I won’t be posting anything until after the 18th. I’m sure I’ll make some notes along the way and think more about my series about sports, concussion, and warfare, but since I’m going to be limited to the company laptop (which I can’t use for personal activities) and I’m going to be surrounded by people 23 1/2 hours of each day, it’s not likely I’ll find the time or space to post anything.

So, I’ll pause for a moment to really soak in the realization that a year ago, this time, I was freaking out about a business trip I was going on. That trip went extremely well, by any estimation, and I’ve had a number of other really good experiences along the line, as well, so this year it’s a very different scene than before.

And that’s pretty amazing. It’s so surreal, I almost can’t believe it… and I almost can’t believe how bent out of shape I used to get over things like this.

Now, it’s just business as usual. A HUGE change from how things were only 12 months ago.

Which leads me to say, yet again, that healing from the effects of TBI is very possible. It’s not always probable, and everyone has a different experience, but for me, the unimaginable has become the everyday. And where (in recent memory) I used to cower and shrink from every unexpected situation and run from anything new, now it’s a very different story.

And it’s good. I’m good.

This makes me all the more keenly aware of how much TBI affected me, this last time. Once upon a time, I would just get on a plane and go. Once upon a time, I would just pick up and take off on any old adventure. But after my mild traumatic brain injury, that all changed. And suddenly I was a hothouse flower who would shrivel and weep at the slightest thing.

God, I hate being that way. It makes me nuts. And while I can get that way when I’m not working at holding myself together, the thought that I’m no longer that way “by default” — that I once again have a choice about my experience — in every unusual situation, makes me extremely grateful for all the help I’ve received and the hope I’ve been given.

Yeah, things are good. Now I’ve gotta go pack.

Be well, folks – I’ll check in again when I’m back.

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Author: brokenbrilliant

I am a long-term multiple (mild) Traumatic Brain Injury (mTBI or TBI) survivor who experienced assaults, falls, car accidents, sports-related injuries in the 1960s, '70s, '80s, and '90s. My last mild TBI was in 2004, but it was definitely the worst of the lot. I never received medical treatment for my injuries, some of which were sports injuries (and you have to get back in the game!), but I have been living very successfully with cognitive/behavioral (social, emotional, functional) symptoms and complications since I was a young kid. I’ve done it so well, in fact, that virtually nobody knows that I sustained those injuries… and the folks who do know, haven’t fully realized just how it’s impacted my life. It has impacted my life, however. In serious and debilitating ways. I’m coming out from behind the shields I’ve put up, in hopes of successfully addressing my own (invisible) challenges and helping others to see that sustaining a TBI is not the end of the world, and they can, in fact, live happy, fulfilled, productive lives in spite of it all.

One thought on “Taking a break for about a week”

  1. A bit of food for thought –

    Perhaps what you have ‘healed’ from is the psychological struggle that you experienced from the self blame and confusion of why you had all these problems. You may still have tbi issues but they do not result in major meltdowns or anxiety because you can handle them.

    Like

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