Better sleep

Yeah…

Got better sleep last night — actually slept through the night. I did the following things that I think helped me:

1. I headed to bed before 10:00 p.m. – the night before, I went to bed around 11:10 and my schedule felt “off”.  If I get to bed later than 10:00, I start to feel rushed and stressed about not getting enough sleep.
2. I set the air conditioner on “low cool” in stead of “medium cool” – the night before, the room got too cold and I woke up both too hot and too cold. I couldn’t seem to regulate my body temperature, which meant I couldn’t relax and get back to sleep.
3. I didn’t eat any sugar or drink any caffeine after supper. In fact, I didn’t have any sugar during the afternoon, either. The day before, I had some candy in the afternoon, and I had some chocolate ice cream for dessert. I think that made it harder for me to relax. (I know – I’m all sensitive ‘n such)
4. I ate earlier – the night before, I didn’t eat until after 9 p.m. That can’t be good. And it wasn’t.

So, I actually slept through – and I got about 7-1/2 hours of continuous sleep. The night before, got three hours of sleep and then four hours of sleep, which technically makes 7 hours, but it was broken up and it wasn’t good quality sleep.

Last night was better. And so am I.

And when I got up, I exercised. Because when I don’t exercise first thing in the morning, I get severely out of sorts, I’m not fully present or involved in my day, and things just don’t “flow” very well… which has a snowball effect of making me more and more anxious and agitated.

I’ve got a doctor’s appointment in a few hours – and then after that I’ll be seeing my neuropsych. I really need to check in with my NP about the past week — feeling so bad, feeling so sick. I’m quite sure it’s just been anxiety, but I do need to check in just to let them know this has been going on. I feel like I’ve worked through it pretty well on my own, but if they don’t know this is going on with me, if something similar happens or if I turn up having more of the same that’s much more intense, then it might not make sense to them, and they won’t see a pattern. And they will have a harder time helping me, I think.

The weird thing is, even though I’m feeling much better and I am not dragged down like I was a few days ago, I still feel like crap. Even though I’m able to function much better than earlier, I really don’t feel well, I have this underlying sense of being a little ill, I’ve got nausea and headache, and I’m just not feeling like myself. I’m tired. Really, really tired. And even though I feel very energized by some things, I still have this other sense of being “off” in some way. It feels physical, not psychological. I’m reluctant to tell my doctor, because I’m afraid they’re going to order tests and start to poke and prod me and try to find something wrong that they can “treat” with drugs. I don’t want to take drugs. I just want to have balance and sanity in my life, and I want to just get on with things.

It could be that this underlying sense of illness will just stay with me, like the chronic pain. And I’ll learn to work with/around it. I’ll learn to keep my attention elsewhere. That could very well be.

Or it could be that this underlying sense can be dissipated with good exercise and stretching and building up my strength. I do know that when I am well-rested, everything gets better. Just how to get well-rested is another question. But it’s one I’ll just have to keep working at. Because it doesn’t make sense to do anything else. I can’t give up. I don’t give up. It’s not in my nature.

So, I’ll just keep going and keep watching… and see what else I can do to help myself get on the good foot.

Better sleep is a start.