… and no people were harmed, either. A couple of times, I came close to snapping at folks, and I did get a little testy at one point. But I managed to pull out of it, just step away and catch my breath — count to 90… distract myself with something more interesting and positive than freaking out — and then get back into the action without making everyone around me uncomfortable… or worse.
And this is good. I have to say, I felt like crap, most of the trip. I was very dizzy, off balance, exhausted, and really feeling terrible about my job and work situation. I was falling asleep on my feet, half the time, and there were a whole lot of conversations I did not even try to keep up with, because I could only concentrate on one thing at a time, and people were being generally self-centered and rude and talking over each other.
But yet I kept my cool. And when I felt things starting to get a little haywire, I did something about it.
I can’t say that I actually enjoyed myself all that much, but at the very least I did NOT harm anyone else, which was change from how things have been before. In the past, people have pretty much regretted that I came to visit — I would get so uptight and snappy and pick fights and be impossible to talk to. Not this time, though. This time was different.
Some things were a bust, on this trip. But the benefits of my “behavior management” were pretty good.
Just glad I’m home. For real.