Focus… focus…

It’s official – I am making myself crazy with procrastination, and having so many things hanging over my head.

Good news, though — on Sunday, I finally tackled four very important pieces of federal and state gov’t paperwork that I need to get on with my life. I had been putting them off for weeks, and I finally got myself to just sit down with it on Sunday morning, spend the day working through it — reading and reading and re-reading everything till my eyes were crossed — and then filling out the forms, making the copies, and mailing them out on Monday morning with the proper certifications.

I was absolutely euphoric on Sunday. It felt so good to get it all done. I was a little down on myself for not doing it all right away several weeks ago, but when I thought about it, I realized the timing was perfect, and there was no fault, no blame. AND I finished it prior to my 2-month deadline (in July), so that is big progress for me.

In the past, I would have waited till July, then rushed at the end, and possibly made a mistake that could have cost me big.

I am having some important phone calls with people this week about next steps, and where I used to dread and fear those calls, I am looking forward to them now. Because I know how to use my tools, and I have some good successes behind me in communicating and getting my point across.

It’s very exciting. And even though I am wiped out (I got about 5-1/2 hours of sleep last night), I am feeling really relaxed. I know I’m not as sharp as I could be, but I am making progress, and that’s what counts.


Author: brokenbrilliant

I am a long-term multiple (mild) Traumatic Brain Injury (mTBI or TBI) survivor who experienced assaults, falls, car accidents, sports-related injuries in the 1960s, '70s, '80s, and '90s. My last mild TBI was in 2004, but it was definitely the worst of the lot. I never received medical treatment for my injuries, some of which were sports injuries (and you have to get back in the game!), but I have been living very successfully with cognitive/behavioral (social, emotional, functional) symptoms and complications since I was a young kid. I’ve done it so well, in fact, that virtually nobody knows that I sustained those injuries… and the folks who do know, haven’t fully realized just how it’s impacted my life. It has impacted my life, however. In serious and debilitating ways. I’m coming out from behind the shields I’ve put up, in hopes of successfully addressing my own (invisible) challenges and helping others to see that sustaining a TBI is not the end of the world, and they can, in fact, live happy, fulfilled, productive lives in spite of it all.

3 thoughts on “Focus… focus…”

  1. It sounds as though you’re talking about the social security department; am I right? The thing that tipped me off was the two month deadline. I too, felt a sense of euphoria when I completed my SSDI paperwork well before the two month deadline. However, it wasn’t long (third of the month) until that euphoria had turned into a four months of hell.

    The S.S Administration saw fit not to honor my request in writing to cancel my Medicare part B saying that, “You had better not cancel because Obamacare will soon be in effect and there will be a mandate with it that says every individual in the U.S. must have healthcare or be fined. If you stop your Medicare now, it will cost you more if you sign up for it again. I don’t think you want to do this…”

    Since when has it been okay for somebody, (a government employee) who is completely ignorant of my situation, to think of what I do and don’t want to do. She had the letter so all she had to do was honor my request instead of thinking. Her thinking cost me, $400 off of my already paltry income. I am disabled and nobody will hire me because of thinking too slow, dexterity issues, mobility issues or my dysarthria and aphasia.

    Our little townhouse that I rent for my daughter and I is always clean, but that cleanliness was too much for the property manger where I live and she told me, “You are anal about cleaning your place.”

    She said that when I asked her about replacing the carpet which needed replacement when I rented the place seven years ago. It was rented with nasty carpet and knife slit kitchen vinyl because I was in dire need of a place for us to live; it was unbearable living with her mother any longer.

    My mind was wandering from one bad hing to another…and so it goes.


  2. The federal government must have a two-month policy – I didn’t have to deal with the SSA, thank God… I screwed up filing some papers a few months ago, and they gave me two months to fix it, which is incredibly nerve-wracking, because I can lose some rights if I don’t get it right the second time.

    The property manager should be happy you’re that “anal”. I’ve lived in plenty of places that weren’t taken care of, and it’s no fun.

    Good luck with everything. Hope you can find some sort of occupation.


  3. Thanks, yeah dealing with any part of the government is maddening,always has been! Good luck to you also.


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