Something magical happens when I quit worrying about everything before and after Right-Here-Right-Now.
I get to focus on what’s in front of me, and just concentrate my energy on that.
It simplifies things.
It relieves my taxed brain of all the what-ifs.
It makes it possible for me to put every single bit of my attention on the activity at hand, and give it my all.
And that’s a really good thing.
One of the drawbacks of mild TBI is that it can really screw with your attention. It makes you susceptible to distraction. It tires out your brain, which makes you even more susceptible to distraction.
Think about it — there are pathways in your brain that have been all messed up, like roads that got washed out during flooding, or a small town Main Street that got completely wiped out by a tornado. Your brain isn’t gone, but the usual ways of information getting around, are disrupted, sometimes wrecked. And you have to find your way through.
That takes energy. And it can be frustrating. It takes creativity and constant adjustment. And that takes even more energy. It takes self-discipline and self-knowledge to manage your moods and behavior, and not many of us have that in abundance, after our brains are injured.
But if I can focus just on what’s in front of me, and not get pulled off in a million different directions, well then… things work much better.
And I can pick my way through the rubble, move it out of the way, and eventually build up paths that take me where I want to go. Over and over, it needs to be done. And it can get exhausting and daunting to do it. But you’ve gotta keep the faith, and keep looking at the signs of progress along the way.
Even the littlest ones.
Focusing on today, the immediate moment, enjoying the good little things, and finding ways I can address the bad little things… that’s the ticket.
At least for today it is.