I’m tired. I woke up feeling groggy and dull.
Still feeling groggy and dull.
Too much adrenaline from the past few days.
I am so relieved it is Friday. It’s just one thing after another.
There’s a lot going on that’s good and bad. And so much of it is good things, that while I know I need to slow down and take it easy, I don’t want to.
I have this pressing feeling that I need to make up for lost time. I need to make up for the years I’ve lost, the money I’ve wasted, the opportunities I’ve passed up.
My birthday is coming up in about a week, and for some reason, turning 50 feels like an event. I don’t know why, because I’ve never actually given my age much thought. Everybody says I seem much younger — though some of that may be immaturity. I’ve never been much for numbers, anyway. And since I have no kids, I don’t feel the march of time the same way everyone else around me does.
It’s strange. I have a life I can be proud of… skills I can be proud of… peace of mind that’s with me in important ways… a life filled with interest and engagement.
But I still feel dull and dense and slow. And I can’t keep up with everything that I want to keep up with. It’s irritating. It’s strange.
Well, whatever. I can’t sit around, feeling badly about all this. It’s time for me to get going. The day awaits.