Website for Veterans with TBI/PTSD at Work

America’s Heroes at Work
Supporting the Employment Success of Returning – Service Members with TBI & PTSD

This website “a U.S. Department of Labor (DOL) project that focuses on the employment challenges of returning service members living with Traumatic Brain Injury (TBI) and/or Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD).”

Bravo! Brava!

The site has good information that’s straightforward and to the point. I would like to see more detail, but I think they’re a fairly new site, and they’re still under construction.

If I ever am in need of support in telling my employer about my TBI(s) and/or coming up with solutions for dealing with my challenges, I’ll definitely point them to this website.

Discretion is the better part of valour

(British & Australian, literary, American & Australian, literary)… means that it is better to be careful and think before you act than it is to be brave and take risks.

I have to re-learn this periodically… sometimes the hard way, by screwing up and remembering that sometimes inhibitions are good!

it’s particularly important for TBI survivors (or anyone dealing with a stigmatized, misunderstood, chronic condition).

As much as we may want to reach out and help others, when it comes to revealing details about ourselves and our lives, tbi survivors need to be especially careful. The rest of the world doesn’t necessarily understand what it’s like to be head-injured and still be functional. There’s a lot of prejudice out there. And if people have information about you having had a tbi, it can work against you.

I recently heard a story about a tbi survivor who posted a comment online identifying themself with first and last name. Unfortunately, they were job-hunting at the time that they posted about having had a tbi, and people they were interviewing with Googled them and found out about them… and their job search got that much harder.

That’s truly unfortunate. I’m sure it happens all too frequently. I know someone whose successful father went through his entire adult life needing to hide his epilepsy because of all the stigma and the negative effect it would have had on his ability to provide for his family.

Sadly, this is still the case with so many conditions. The ADA is supposed to protect people like us from discrimination, but there are so many ways for employers and lenders and other folks in power to get around the laws, that even if we are discriminated against, the burden is on us to prove it. And if you’ve got a cognitive deficit and you can’t afford a decent lawyer, well, then you can be pretty much out of luck.

Some Poor Person’s Strategies for Preserving Autonomy and Human Dignity are…

  • Silence. Period.
  • Strictly closed lips about your condition unless you’re in the company of close confidantes who can be trusted.
  • Obsessively guarded health information that is Never Ever shared with others who may use that information against you. That includes co-workers or colleagues who may be competing with you professionally, at some point on down the line.
  • Making sure you surround yourself with family and loved ones and friends and supporters who can defend you, no matter what.

It’s unfortunate that we live in a world where something as random as a head injury can have such a dramatic impact on your life and livelihood, but it happens. All the time.

With this in mind, I’ve disabled the setting on this blog that requires a name and email address for each comment. I hope this may help others like me avoid the situation that hapless job-hunter had to deal with.


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A good day… sort of… I think…

Today was a good day.

I think.

So far, anyway.

I’m actively looking for work, right now, after taking a little over a month off for the holidays. I’m finding that dealing with people — especially co-workers — during the holidays is just too much for me to take, these days. I can’t stand the hurried pace, the rush, the frantic-ness of it all, not to mention all the issues that people at work have around their families, their emotional issues, their holiday trauma-drama… It’s just so tiresome, and my coping skills could really use some improving. So, until I get/feel better this time of year, I’ve taken to checking out from Thanksgiving through New Years.

This is the third year I’ve done this. I’m a consultant, so I can adjust my schedule accordingly — work like a dog for 10-11 months, bill all the hours I can get my hands on, then take the last month of the year off. It works for me. It’s much better than getting overloaded in December and then acting out. That just wasn’t working with me. Plus, after my re-injury at the end of 2004, I just had to quit the the holiday season wholesale, to take care of myself (and spare the world from my outbursts and social uneasiness).

In the months after my fall over Thanksgiving of 2004, I became increasingly non-functional in tight spots at work — with no clue why. I became a real problem at the office, what with my temper flaring and socially inappropriate outbursts around co-workers and my concentration shot to hell and my impulse control and emotional extremes all over the map. Unfortunately, I didn’t know why it was happening to me… all I knew was, I couldn’t function around those “a**holes at work” anymore (I won’t tell you what they thought about me!), and I had to make some choices. After enduring a grueling year of real struggles with myself and others, I realized at the end of 2005 that it just wasn’t working, that combination of holiday stress and my mental/emotional situation (tho’ I didn’t realize I was dealing with a TBI at the time).

So, I decided to just quit. Take the time away from the office. Stop working. And it was great!

I have to admit, I was pretty nervous, when I first “dropped out” at the end of 2005. I am a workaholic by nature, and the longest I’d ever gone without work in nearly 20 years was 2 weeks. So, being away from an office and a client for longer than 10 working days was a whole new thing. But it was a good thing. And when the New Year came around and I had brand new clients in 2006, I realized the sky wasn’t going to fall if I wasn’t working 51 weeks out of the year. So, I did it again in 2006. Took six weeks off between Thanksgiving and New Years. And I did it again this holiday season.

Now I’m back in the job market, looking for clients. Sending out curriculum vitaes. Quoting hourly rates. Hob-nobbing and networking and schmoozing, oh my! I’ve had some good nibbles, but I’d be a lot happier if things were nailed down.

That will come. Some of my leads are very strong, and I’m feeling positive. I never mention TBI when I deal with clients. That’s not the sort of thing I feel comfortable telling people as a consultant. As a full-time permanent employee, it would make sense to tell my employer that I’ve got this disability, since the ADA was created to protect people like me/us in such a situation. But as an independent consultant, there’s just no way I’ll ever breathe even a hint about my TBI background to prospective clients.

My job is to make their lives easier, not more difficult, and throwing brain injury into the mix is not something that makes their lives easier… or my life, for that matter.

Still, a part of me pines for a full-time job that lets me be protected by legislation passed to help people like me. I’d love to be able to show up at an office and know that there are laws in place to keep me from being preyed upon, persecuted, exploited, and treated like a second-class citizen by ignorant boobs. It might take some of the pressure off.

Maybe if the independent consultant gig gets too dicey, I’ll look for a gig like that. But for the time being, while I’m still of sound mind — well, mostly, anyway 😉 — and body, I’ll keep billing at my professional services rate and retain my freedom.

Today was a good day. So far. Good progress.