Getting back, one step at a time.

Adrenaline - I got more than my fair share, this past weekend
This is Adrenaline – I got more than my fair share, this past weekend

Full weekend.


It was good, though.

I got the critical things done ahead of time, and then I spent all day yesterday with a buddy, going to see an exhibition of Japanese art and culture. It was pretty amazing – especially seeing things that real people made with their hands, instead of something that they made on a computer. The handiwork of some of the furniture was amazing.

I wish I had more energy to take it all in, but yesterday was a pure adrenaline day. I had to help my spouse the night before with a business activity (their back is out, so they need assistance), and not only was I pushed really hard to do a lot of things, but I was up past midnight on Saturday – and I rarely sleep in – so I did not get enough sleep for Sunday.

Yesterday was good. We checked out the art, the craftsmanship, the joinery, the materials… and then we got some lunch – late. My routine was completely blown away. We were near a neighborhood where I used to eat, and sure enough, the old taqueria was there, where I used to always get massive burritos for a very low price. The store burned down, during the years after I moved away, but I thought for sure they would rebuild, because they were so popular – and sure enough. Line was out the door. And the food was still amazing.

We ended up hanging out the entire day, and we had dinner at my home with my spouse, who is actually much better friends with this individual than I am. We’re all on good terms, so it was a good time.

I just had no time for myself, which is a problem on the weekends. I really need my downtime – space when I am only doing things that are in my head and my intentions. Or I pay the price.

I’m feeling it today. I started to get a migraine yesterday, but I got an hour-long nap, and that helped. Work, work, and more work. Not so great for my system, which needs balance.

This week I will balance. I don’t have a lot of appointments. Just two, compared to the past. I think I’m going to back off on my acupuncture and chiropractor, because I am really tired of not getting home till 8:00 p.m. and then having to make dinner, and not eating until 8:30 or 9:00. It’s too late for me. And I’ve been pushing myself for too long, trying to fit everything in.

I just want my routine back. I just want my regular schedule. I have to have it, or I am toast. And if others cannot accommodate me, too bad.

It’s actually good that I am getting to this point. I have been pushing myself very, very hard, for a long time, and it’s about time that I really focused on just taking care of myself in ways that are less rigorous — and are closer to home.

It’s all a lesson.


Picking and choosing

How you like them apples?

I have a lot of paperwork to fill out, these days.

The car accident and totalling the vehicle means there are police reports and vehicle inventories to assemble and respond to.

I don’t have time to slog through everything, so I’m picking and choosing what I’m going to concentrate on, and stick with that.

I’ve also canceled some of my appointments this week, and I will likely cut down on the number of appointments I have in the future.

I need the free time more than I need the caretaking.

And frankly, I’m getting tired of all the talking and sorting things through.

I’ll keep my network chiropractic appointments, because that’s really helping me a lot, but the rest of them… driving all over creation to get to these places which may or may not be helpful? I dunno.

Plus, it’s really starting to piss me off, that my neuropsych is — still — so oblivious to what’s really going on with me. It’s like they made up their mind about me, way back when, and nothing has changed. I’m really getting tired of having to explain myself all the time.

How would it be, if I could just get home at a decent hour, instead of late-late, several times a week?

It’s been a long winter. I need a break.


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