Going to get my taurine… and probiotics… and exercise

Gotta get some new stuff to work with
Gotta get some new stuff to work with

So, I’ve been listening to the Joe Rogan Experience podcast with Dr. Rhonda Patrick, and it’s pretty amazing stuff. Google it or search on YouTube. I’m not going to give you the direct link, because you should find it yourself – and beautiful things can happen when you start searching.

You’ll probably find more info out there, than I can point you to, anyway. It’s all about initiative, focus, and follow-through. And if you’re like me, you’ll go off and start searching, find a bunch of stuff that is both more relevant and a total distraction… and then 30 minutes later, you’ll realize that you were really looking for that podcast, and you have to regroup and refocus.

Which is all good practice, anyway.

I’ve been listening to the Joe Rogan Experience podcast (Powerful JRE), and in between the talk about MMA and smoking pot (which I don’t, for personal reasons, as well as what I’ve seen long-term smoking do to friends), there are podcasts featuring really smart people who know a lot about how the human system gets damaged — and how to fix that damage.

Dr. Mark Gordon is one of those people. Dr. Rhonda Patrick is another one. And they’re all talking about head trauma, what it does to you, and how you can mitigate the effects.

And in the process of learning more, I’m finding other information. Like how the amino acid taurine helps you grow new brain cells. Apparently, it does a lot of helpful things – and if you don’t have enough of it, it’s not great for you. That’s bad, in fact.

I’m also getting confirmation from scientists on the JRE podcast who really know how to explain things to the rest of us, that’s confirming what I’ve read and believe – in ways that really stoke my determination. Exercise has become even more important to me, thanks to their on-camera talks, and more specifically, interval training is taking center stage. I’ve been more active in the past six weeks than I have been in quite some time, thanks to the fitness centers and the pool at work, and I’d backed off on my morning workouts. But now I’m back to them, especially on weekends, pushing myself harder than I have in quite some time. Just really making myself work does wonders for my mood and alertness, over the course of each day.

I’m a little out of it this morning (workout notwithstanding). I had a long and busy week, and then I was up late last night, getting some must-do items out of the way. I also woke up early, and I’m groggy and foggy. I’m not a big fan of feeling this way, but by this afternoon, I will be on a beach, probably lying down under the umbrella, just chillin’. I’ve got a week ahead of me to balance out a little bit of work with some major chill-time, so that’s something to look forward to.

The main thing is, I stay aware of my surroundings, I take care of myself, I don’t rush, and I just be deliberate about every.little.thing.

I can’t afford to have an accident or get hurt, and I’m sufficiently depleted and spacey, that it’s a definite risk. I also can’t afford to not do the things I need to do. I’ve got errands to run and bags to pack and vehicles to clean out, before I go, so…

The main thing with me, these days, is to keep safe and get healthy and strong. There’s a tradeoff, of course, because it’s tough to get really healthy and really strong without some element of risk … or stressing your system. If you’re pushing the envelope regularly, you’re going to develop in certain ways, and those ways will probably also be accompanied by stress. It’s tough to push yourself past your limits without stress — and a bit of damage.

So, the task at hand is to not back off and avoid stress and risk and situations that test me, but to figure out how to recover better, build myself back, and develop strengths rather than weaknesses.

Some people come up against challenges, and when they fall short (or feel like they do), they interpret it as meaning they’re deficient. And as they face one challenge after another, they keep confirming their suspicions that they’re not up to the task – or any task at all. And they block themselves in, building a wall around themselves that keeps the world out and also keeps them out of the world. Eventually, it keeps them from doing anything and everything that matters to them and gives their lives meaning. They’ve done it to themselves, but they think the rest of the world is to blame.

When I fall short, I take it as a challenge and important information about where I need to improve, in order to reach my goals. If anything, I want those experiences to tear down the walls and give me more access to strengths and abilities I never knew I had before. Sometimes you have to really take a hit, before you can access hidden talents and gifts.

But you don’t want all the hits to tear the crap out of you, so…

You’ve got to build back up. Recover. Be smart about things – which can be difficult, if you’ve gotten hit in the head a bunch of times. I’m lucky, in that I know that I have executive function difficulties, so I can make some really bad decisions, especially under stressful situations or when I am tired. It gives me pause. A reality check.

Speaking of reality check, I’m getting my raw DNA data sequenced online. I uploaded my raw DNA data from ancestry.com to the website promethease.com/ondemand, paid $5, and now I’m waiting for the results. It takes about 20 minutes to do it, so I’ll go get my shower and get ready for the day, then check back in.

Fascinating stuff. Largely recreational… and who knows what I’ll find. Hopefully, I’ll get some more data that will show me where I’ve got vulnerabilities, so I can do something about them. Finding out if I’m generically predisposed to Alzheimer’s will change things for me, I’m sure. After all the TBIs I’ve had, I need to know if this could be a problem. It’s always in the back of my mind, but why not find out what the data says.

Anyway, time to get moving. This day won’t move itself.

Onward!

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Making the most of… everything

Focusing on the good… trying, anyway

Well, my time off is winding down. It’s Friday, and it’s my last day off work for quite some time. It’s been a good week, although being off my usual schedule has proven to be both a blessing and a real challenge.

It’s been so great to get things done that I’ve been thinking about for quite some time. It’s also been great, getting some time in, just thinking things through, focusing in on what I want to do with myself this coming year, and getting clear on what I do NOT want to do.

The challenge has been spending a lot of time with my spouse. I’ve mentioned their anxiety a lot of times, so I don’t want to belabor the point. Suffice it to say, it’s not easy living in close quarters with someone who is afraid of their own shadow and has anxiety about every little thing, and spends countless hours stewing about their anxieties to justify them — and amplify them.

It’s pretty taxing for me to deal with their constant anxiety. It’s a total drain, and I end up fatigued — and incredibly cranky. It’s not much fun for either of us. I just need to remember that they’re not 100% like they used to be. They’re declining, and they need some extra help and assistance and patience. I just wish I didn’t get so exhausted by the whole thing.

Whew! In that respect, it’s going to be good to get back to work. I’ve caught up on my sleep, somewhat, and I’ve gotten a lot of ducks in a row, so now I can move forward with steady steps and progress. The main thing is, I’ve had time to think… and walk around in the woods while I’m thinking. That’s gotten my head on straight and kept me from veering off in a bazillion different directions. And that, in itself, is a very positive step for 2015.

I’m a little irked that I have to go back to work on Monday. But I’m also glad. I’ve missed the company of my “work tribe” and also the daily routine. If I had my own business and a regular routine around my own endeavors, it would be one thing, but this past week has been a bit of a mad dash to get in as much “extra-curricular” stuff as I can, while I can. Having a regular schedule, with a regular sleeping pattern is also very important, and I’ve had a few late nights, this past week, which have thrown me off. Including New Year’s.

That’s one of the reasons I really hate New Year’s. My spouse wants me to stay up, but I just want to go to bed at 10:00. One year, I got to do that, and it was heaven. But with my spouse… different story.

Anyway, in a few more days I can go back to my regular schedule, and it’s not all that bad. I’ve gotten my head screwed on straight about my priorities, and I’ve broken down a bunch of larger undertakings into smaller bite-size pieces, so I’m not so overwhelmed with all the details. I have places to start, and I’m starting. Heck, I’ve more than started. I’m well on my way. And I’ve made a good beginning already. I’ve been geared up for 2015 for a couple of months, now.

So, onward! I’m doing a road trip with my spouse today. We’ll see how that goes. The two of us are pretty tired of each other, right about now, but this is our last day to spend the whole day together. So, we might as well make the most of it, put our differences aside, and just enjoy each other’s company when we have it.

Today I don’t have to DO anything. I can just be. We’ll see how that goes 😉

There will always be walls… and reasons… and more

What's stopping you?

“My name is Daniel Ilabaca. I used to have nightmares. I used to be angry. I used to try to run through walls. I used to battle with my obstacles. I used to try to fight with my fears. It used to make me tired. But I found a better way. I knew there would always be another wall and another place to fall. I learned to use my obstacles. I learned to go over them. And around them. Now I am free of my fears. Now I am awake. Now I am happy. My name is Daniel Ilabaca. And I live what I dream.”

Just got done watching this: http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=6549235439965926929#

You should watch it, too. Don’t try it at home (unless you’ve been training like a beast for a very long time), but watch it.

I’m a little sore today. Changed up my workouts. Pushing myself harder, doing the kinds of movements that actually have something to do with my life.

It’s more than about getting in decent physical condition, losing the winter weight, getting rid of the extra pounds. It’s about stamina. Strength. Being able to go higher and do more and not getting worn out in the process.

I’ve noticed that I do much better, overall, when I am in good physical condition. TBI can screw up your metabolic system — how your body creates and manages energy. It can also make you tired more quickly, and tiredness can lead to agitation as well as a host of cognitive and behavioral issues. I find that when I’m tired, I get angry quicker, I do stupid things more, I say things I don’t mean to say. Things fall apart more, and I react more strongly to them.

Things rapidly fall out of perspective, when I am tired.

So, I’m working on my stamina, which really depends on my strength. Physical strength. The ability to sustain physical activity without running out of steam. If I have more physical strength — and flexibility — I have more reserves to draw from. I can do the simple things for longer, without getting thrashed. And that means I can postpone the meltdown — or avoid it entirely — better than when I am out of shape and do not have the energy and strength to go on.

Make no mistake — brain injury, even mild, does a number on you. And the mild stuff is even more pernicious, because it’s not obvious, but it takes an internal toll that over the long term can be VERY difficult to navigate and negotiate.

So, if I build up my strength and flexibility — take good care of my body overall — it gives me the ability to do things more easily in my everyday life. And I feel better about myself, being in decent condition. Able to lift myself up. Better able to support myself, literally as well as figuratively. And balance. It lets me balance.

Oh yes — BALANCE — that’s gotten a whole hell of a lot better. I used to have to hold onto the handle of the oven in the kitchen, when I did my leg lifts. Now I can stand and balance without needing to hold on. And I can even stand on one leg, arms outstretched, and do my leg lifts — front, back, and side — and not fall over.

This is big. Because balance has been such a challenge for me over the years, and few things set me off more than being off balance. It’s exhausting. But with more strength, more core strength, especially, I can balance and I have more of a foundation to rely on, so even when I am having trouble with my ears, my legs and core can compensate for it. And I don’t need to fall over.

See, here’s the thing – no matter what, there will always be walls. There will always be obstacles. There will always be something getting in the way. Whether it’s TBI or mTBI or concussion or constant pain or vertigo or tactile defensiveness or headaches or mental fogginess… there will always be something that gets in the way. But I don’t have to let that stop me.

Watch parkour on YouTube for a few hours, and then tell me the usual obstacles need to always get in the way. The point of watching this is NOT to go out and do it. I don’t have anywhere near the physical strength to pull this stuff off, and I really can’t take the chance of more concussions, from jumping from high places and climbing up walls. The point of watching this IS to see how others negotiate obstacles in their own individual ways and truly defy common “wisdom” saying that such things are not possible.

It is possible, and with the proper training and dedication and mindset, it IS possible. They even make it look easy.

In much the same sense, I see no reason why those of us who battle these complications of concussion and TBI shouldn’t find our own way of overcoming the obstacles that get in our way. The obstacles could be as mundane as going to the grocery store, or as overwhelming as taking on a new job or a new career, or navigating the hazardous waters of human relationship.

With the proper training, consistent discipline and practice, and true commitment to living the best life possible, who knows what else could happen in your own life? I’m still working on figuring out what else can happen in my own.

Care to join in?